Valley of the Dolls (the next generation)
or
The Dead Jackie Susann Drinking Game

Rules: Game is best played after 2am. Requires at least 4 people to be really fun. And to be really worth your time, we recommend at least 2 rounds of your favorite cocktail or mind-numbing beverage like Strawberry Quick!
Objective: To create the ultimate cast for the remake of the film adaptation of the Valley of the Dolls.This is our most recent effort:

Anne Welles--The haughty but naive WASP who starts out as a secretary and ends up a tortured hair care model. Her one true love, Lyon, leaves her for a writing career and then when they reconcile, he leaves again, this time for another woman. We'd pick Winona Ryder.

Neely O'Hara--The hard drinking, fast living, tantrum throwing, starlet who starts out as a nice kid dancer and ends up a bloated, bitter, husband stealing has-been superstar who at the novel's end is seen in the throes of a nervous breakdown in a deserted theatre alley. We'd pick Courtney Love.

Jennifer North--The tragically beautiful, the graciously endowed "art film" golden Venus who turns Hollywood Golden Girl and then ends it all when she discovers she has breast cancer. All along she believes that her talent is her body and wants desperately to be loved for anything but her body, but of course, never is. We'd pick Amanda De Cadenet.

Tony Polar--The dumb but physically attractive lounge singer. No contest, we'd pick Evan Dando.

Lyon--The dashing Brit who at first appears gallant and lovable but turns cold and cruel when he betrays Anne his devoted wife by having an affair with Anne's friend Neely. Let's see... a cute Brit who turns out to be a snake in the grass...we'd pick Hugh Grant.

Henry Bellamy--The only nice guy in the whole story. The sweet, even-tempered confidante who dispenses advice instead of pills. We'd pick Michael Stipe.

Helen Lawson--The aging star who rumbles with Neely in a stunning bathroom scene that ends with Neely flushing the divine Ms. Lawson's wig down the toilet...we'd pick Madonna.


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